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Aloha!
I recently read a post about trusting a new practitioner because you were referred to them by someone whom you trust
Something didn't sit well with me about that but I wasn't quite sure why
I let it simmer for a while and this is what I came up with
Referrals are a great first step
But the fact that you trust the person who referred you is only the first step
you should never abdicate your own responsibility - you should also use your own judgment in determining whether someone is at the core worth working with or not, and whether they are a good match for you
There is a long list of professionals who have abused their professional duties and responsibilities- preachers and teachers, doctors, counselors and therapists
The list goes on and on ...
self-described gurus and yoga teachers
The dilemma is that most people who are evil (or just can't hold professional boundaries and ethics...) are good at hiding the fact that they are evil (or don't hold professional boundaries and ethics ...)
So their best friends, their coworkers and their families likely have no idea what they're really up to when they are working with clients
So while getting a referral from a trusted friend or associate for any of the above mentioned types of positions - particularly for intimate work such as somatic sex education - can be helpful and important
You should never discount your own internal messages from your body while meeting with or working with any practitioner
Learning to listen to your body it's a crucial part of this type of work
And the more it's practiced the better you will get at it
If you meet with someone and your body says "ick" then this practitioner is not a good fit for you (!)
the body never lies
the more you practice listening to it, the more it will tell you
So if you're ever in a situation with a masseur or therapist or counselor or doctor or preacher or anyone else, when any kind of contact or touch feels inappropriate to you
you should listen to your body and say something to stop it (or get up and run!)
and then tell someone else - maybe the person who referred you or a family member or friend or even the police
Your body doesn't lie
Listen to it
Namaste